He accepted help the day it was offered to him, in the studio where he was recording a TV series, and it was the first step towards recovery, but it wasn’t easy to leave so many years of cocaine consumption – daily and unsupervised, on the final stretch. An actor and one of the most famous faces on television, Pedro Barroso knows that addiction has been destroying him, in his relationship with friends and family, in relation to his work colleagues, but also financially and physically.

In this interview included in the series “Labyrinth – Mental Health Talks”, an initiative by the Observador and FLAD, recorded at the Pestana Palácio do Freixo, in Porto, says he used to “not feel”, although what cocaine gave him was precisely the ability to talk about things he had previously chosen to hide. The grandmother’s death revealed the feelings she had been trying so hard to suppress and opened the way for treatment. At the center where he stayed for five months, he felt fear, sadness and shame at having to look back on all he had done – and share it with other patients. But he also felt safe, balanced, and happy.

Frankly, he says it’s important to talk about the setbacks: He started eating again after a few months; He relapsed after traveling around the world. He says it was always as if a mountain had fallen on top of him and this is also why he always talks about addiction nowadays, not least because the craving to consume may not be daily, but the alertness is always there. If something becomes disorganized and out of balance, a light “turns on”.

However, life has changed a lot: he lives in the village of Freixo with his wife Mariana and son Santiago, who is now eight months old. He’s established himself as an entrepreneur, though he’s stayed connected to TV and is believed to be starting to prepare for a comeback. Also because he answers a clear “no” to the question if his addiction has irreparably prevented him from becoming the actor he could become: “It’s important that I can put it this way: I have big goals.”

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